As I sit here drinking my coffee, I am savoring the most beautiful sound. The sound of complete and utter silence. Monday mornings are usually this way. After I take Lance to work, I come home and have a few hours of complete aloneness. Usually I have to work, but often take some time when I first get home to breathe and simply sit and absorb life a little bit.
Today the quiet is exceptionally alluring and peaceful. I spent the past week experiencing what could be a glimpse into my distant future. Lance and I were house/child/dog/cat sitting for the week and I was completely caught off guard by how exhausted I was when it was all over. Yes, the kids went to school during the day, but then I went and hung out with other children. So my week was basically a blur of kids galore, maintaining schedules, subduing tantrums, cooking, cleaning, middle-of-the-night nightmares, etc. In general, it was great. Really, it was. Especially doing it with Lance (the only child who has never even held a baby!) and getting to see a quick peek into how he would be as father. You always hear women proclaiming that seeing their husbands as fathers is, well, sexy. It always seems (to me anyway!) like a slightly odd connection, but now I think I just might get it! ;)
|This is Oscar. He slept with us every night and liked to be under the covers with his head on the pillow. He also pees in the toilet. He thinks he's a person.|
This morning is my first time being alone since then. It has really reminded me how important this time is for me. I mean, I fully accept and am completely aware that I am an introvert, but I fall into the same patterns as most Americans seem to of glorifying "busy". So, I fill my schedule as much as possible and am constantly griping about how "busy" I am. It's funny because there have been times in my life where I have been a lot busier, with many more mandatory and challenging things on my plate, but, nevertheless, I continue to busy myself with other things and then complain about them.
The stark contrast of a week with children and animals all up in my business compared to this moment of being completely alone has reminded me to set aside times where I am NOT busy and where I can be by myself. I need alone time. I crave it. I recharge with it. Without it I get a little crazy and on edge (sorry hubby!). And yet, somehow, I often forget to take it.
P.S. Just in case I needed something else to busy myself with, I have joined Vine (a new app like Instagram, but for sharing short videos!). I'm Kylee Noelle, come find me!